Brandi

"And all because of him....my world is changing"

2007-04-06T00:24:38Z

So I know I've been terrible at updating my journal and work has been insane and I've been ridiculously stressed out.

BUT

I do in fact have big/scary/exciting news. :-) My lease in my current apartment ends June 1st, which means we will all sadly be moving soon. And I am sad to lose my roommies. However, I will in fact be moving and will have a brand new roommate. One that I honestly want to spend the rest of my life with and one I know feels the same way. Yes, that means I'll be moving in with Jeff come June this year.

It's a really big step I know and one that's a little scary and again one that my family isn't thrilled about. They're ok with it and being wonderful about the decision even though I know they're not happy we're not married first. But that's ok with me I think. And I know this is not characteristic of me. But I've gotten to the point where I know I love him and I know I want to be with him and he's said the same thing. And he's also brought up marriage (not me!) which is good to know. I just don't think he's quite ready for that yet, and maybe in some ways I'm not quite there yet either, although it's hard to not think so when all of my friends are starting to get engaged and such. But I do know we're ready to take the next step forward and to making a more serious commitment. And to me that's what moving in together is. I mean yes, it's a lot more convenient right now and Jeff already owns a house. But to me this is also our next step in our relationship and I'm really excited about it! I can't wait to be able to fall asleep next to him every night and then wake up in the morning with him right there again. I also know it's going to feel so great to be able to come home to him after work every day, especially after a rediculously long and stressful one which seems to be many days lately. And we've talked about this and are both really excited about it now. And I know it's not technically how things are supposed to progress and it's not something I ever thought I would do. I always said marriage first. But having gotten to this point I don't necessarily see anything wrong with living together if you know you love each other and you both know that marriage is the plan in the future when things are right. And it wouldn't surprise me if Jeff already has somewhat of a plan anyways regarding proposing because he did hint at that this past weekend. But he's good at keeping secrets and is adament that it's his special thing to do. So I'm happy with that. And I'm really happy with him and everything that's happening.

YAY!! Im going to move in with Jeff into an adorable house in a nice suburban area in New Jersey. Yes, I will become a Jersey girl now. Melissa, I'm joining ya in New Jersey! ;-) Something I certainly never imagined would happen but that's a minor detail. ;-) But it's such a great area and I love his house and everything about it all. It's a perfect starter home and one in which there's some space to grow in with respect to a future family. This is all I've ever wanted honestly. A good job, the man of my dreams, and to be capable of raising a future family together in a nice house and area. :-)

Anyways, needless to say I'm sooooo excited!! And I'm really happy. And on that note I'll stop being sappy and go relax for a bit. I've gotta start gathering up my stuff and figure out what to keep and what to send home. I just had to share my news. I'm sooooo excited!!! :-) People will definitely have to come and visit us now. ;-)

Questions from Melissa :-)

2007-03-01T01:39:49Z

1. What's the best part about being done with school?

Hmmm, see that's a tough question cause honestly as of late I've kinda wanted to be back in school rather than work. This is mostly because my work hours are insane, my boss is an idiot who overworks everyone, and I don't like what I've just recently been assigned to do. Class is almost tempting after all this. But I do have to say it's nice not having homework I have to stay up until all hours of the night finishing. I like being able to know that when I leave work for the day I'm finished and can do whatever I want for the rest of the night....even if it only is a few short hours before I have to get some sleep to be able to think clearly the next morning. :-/ And I also do really enjoy working with Tejal now. I hardly ever saw her in school.

2. Looking back over the past 10 years since we started high school together (yeah, I can't believe it either!), what is one thing you would change if you could? Why?

Wow, 10 years is a really long time! It doesn't seem that long ago. But I'm so happy to be able to say I still keep in touch and have really good friends from 10 years ago. ;-)

Anyways, your question right! Ummm, that's really hard for me to say. Honestly, I tend to believe that the things that happen to us in life make us who we become for better or for worse. I mean there are obvious family things I wish hadn't begun seriously impacting my life beginning in high school up until more recently. But those things have made me look at myself and be determined to make myself a better person and most important a better future mother and wife someday. And that's really important to me. So I don't think I would change that even if it seems like the most obvious answer. I guess if I had to pick something to change I would change my inability to prevent myself from being hurt. I never and still don't really know how to carry a grudge which can be a good thing but it also can really screw you over at times. There were guys I dated or let myself fall for knowing it wasn't worth it and sure enough I wound up only getting hurt (can we say Matt Dolci!?) I mean really, how many times did we have to date and him completely and utterly break my heart when I least expected it, to get me to understand that this was not a good thing! But every time I kept thinking there must be something good in him, he does really care about me, etc. I never should have continued to date him into the college years, I should have just let it end on a good friendship note after senior year. Buuuuuut no, it took him cheating on me and getting a girl pregnant to get me to finally blow up at him (after 5 years) and tell him how much of a jerk he really is. That is a really good example at least. I'd just like to go back and make myself less vunerable and easily taken advantage of. Never been something I've been good at stopping.

3. What's one thing you wouldn't change for anything in the world? Why?

So many things immediately come to mind with this question. Tough questions! I'm going to go with the biggest one that immediately came to mind. I wouldn't change my family or those I love for the world. My family, my friends, and Jeff mean everything to me. They've made me who I am, they've taught me things I never thought I'd learn, and they've always been there for me no matter what. There were really lousy times both in high school and in college but the fact that I had a close knit family both at home and with my friends made all the difference in the world. I still consider myself rediculously lucky to have so many friends that have known me since high school and can still read me like an open book (and I can say the same for them) which is really special. And the more recent friends I've made are just as good. And having Jeff come into my life has really just completed my picture. I feel like I finally have everything: my family both in friends and at home and the love of my life. And I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world. :-)

4. Which vacation/trip that you have taken was your absolute favorite and why?

Oh so many wonderful trips taken and hopefully many more to follow! I think I'm gonna go with Egypt and Israel on this one (they were the same trip so they count as 1!). I absolutely LOVE ancient civilizations and those two combined really just blew my mind. And I know I was young when I was there but I kept a detailed journal of everything we saw and have labeled pictures of everything I could take a picture of. I have to say there's nothing quite like riding a camel up to the great Pyramids of Giza, taking in the view of everything, and getting off only to climb the steep steps up inside. It's just incredible. And it's funny b/c you climb all the way up to the top inside the Pyramid and find nothing more than an empty room with a granite case in the center. But the sheer concept of where I was, how old it was, and everything that it had meant was mind boggling. And Israel was just the same, the churchs we saw, Massada, the Cave that held the Dead Sea scrolls, floating in the Dead Sea, and walking the steps of the Via Dela Rosa. It was just a once in a lifetime trip! And I have to say it's really kinda creepy to say that they were blowin stuff up right before we got there and then right after we left. But for those moments we were safe and enjoying some of history's most fascinating and amazing wonders. I totally have pictures of us eating at a Burger King in Jerusalem a week before that very spot was bombed AND THEN pictures of my siblings and I standing in front of Queen Hatsheptsuts Temple a week before it too was bombed by terrorists. I worry sometimes that the great things I saw both in Israel and in Egypt won't last long enough for me to take my children to see them. I want more than anything for them to experience the wonders of the world like I have. But at the rate we're going especially in those countries there won't be anything left to see. I don't think those sites will ever fully be the same as I saw them then and therefore, I have to say I value that trip so much because I know I might not ever have gotten to see it had we not gone when we did.

5. What have you done that you are the most proud of?

I'm proud of who I am honestly. I'm proud of myself for making it through both Governors and Drexel with an amazing degree and with that I've been able to land a high level job at Merck developing vaccines to save peoples lives. It's what I've always said I wanted to do. I never could manage being a doctor, but I love striving to cure diseases and help save lives. It's really rewarding...even if the job is insanely stressful. ;-) And I'm proud of myself for getting myself situated well immediately. Hopefully, this set-up will allow me to achieve one of my biggest goals in life in the future and that is to be able to be a stay at home mother and raise my children the best way possible. I so badly want to be a mother and to have an amazing family to share my life with. And I think I've done an amazing job in getting myself situated well enough to achieve that in the future.

Rules:
1. Leave me a comment saying, "interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions.
3. You will update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Life is good

2006-06-02T01:29:25Z

So yes I haven't updated in quite some time but it's only because things have been going so well and thus going by so quickly. But that's a good thing too especially when one is a graduating senior. ;-)

So yeah I'm officially graduating in sixteen days. And I am not just simply graduating either. I will be graduating with honors distinction and cum laude! Not bad for a rediculously over worked, stressed, but determined engineering major. I am quite proud of myself especially given the low grade times freshman and sophomore year....I came back! Take that Drexel! :-P

To continue good happy news, Jeff and I hit our one year anniversary this past weekend which of course meant the Pi Nu Hershey trip where everything first began to a point. The fact that we required a movie night with brothers/sisters the following night to finally get things to happen is a minor detail really! ;-) But I have to say I'm soooo unbelievably thankful that things did happen cause I have to say I couldn't be happier. Jeff is absolutely amazing and I love him. I don't think I can imagine life without him honstly. I really am lucky. And even better come July 2nd we will both be joining my family for a cruise to Greece and Turkey my dream trip! I can't wait it's gonna be so incredible. And the best part is getting to share it with him. He got a new camera for the trip two weekends ago and both of our families have started talking and planning for the trip. We're gonna have a blast! Now if he'd just let me see his passport lol.

Other wonderful exciting news...Mary, Ashley, and I got the keys to our new house today!! It still needs a lil bit of work but I think it's going to be the perfect house. I'm looking forward to moving into a new place after graduation, a house no less ya know? I think it's a good step. All these other "growing up" steps tho are not nearly as simple. I still have to go get an actual bank account, both checking and savings as well as a credit card since I will finally be rid of AJ Drexel Bank and have no past credit to my name. These are big changes and tho a lil scary I wanna be fully independant and on my own. I know I can do it! I'm really proud of myself thus far. Although, I do have to admit I never imagined the end of my college career as turning out the way it actually has. But ya know the way it is now is so much better than what I had thought anyways! So that's a very good sign!

All in all things are really, really good. It's been a long, hard fight to get to this point but I've made it. Work with Merck will begin July 17th, a month after graduation....not a bad deal at all. I'll have time to move in and get myself settled into the new house. Then onto graduation fun times including Jeff and I's parents meeting for the first time over dinner. I'm sure things will be wonderful, I adore Jeff's family and while mine is kooky and scary I can't imagine my family would scare them too far away. ;-) And both sets of parents are looking forward to it all so I'm happy. Then it's some relax and family visiting time before we ship out to Venice, Italy to board the cruise for a week and a half. Ooooooh I can't wait! Everything for the next two months is going to be crazy and busy and hectic but it's going to be the best two months ever!! :-)

And now there's lightning outside to watch that's absolutely gorgous so I think I'm going to go relax and enjoy it for a change. :-)

:::sigh:::

2006-03-06T03:16:45Z

So this term has definitely been rediculously long and insane. I really just wanna graduate honestly. I'm tired of putting up with classes where the prof doesn't know what he's doing/trying to teach us or if he does it's so completely over our heads and useless there's no point. It just gets old and frustrating really fast aside from all the stress that comes along with assigning a huge project worth 60% of your grade two weeks before the term ends. NOT COOL! Add that to senior design and all of the stresses associated with that and things just get rediclously complicated and stressful.

My team got told last Tuesday that our current design was bad. The final paper is due tomorrow so that's less than a week to both re-write the entire paper and create a brand new design. Fortunately, my team is just that skilled and had another design in mind previously that could be slightly modified to solve our problem. But still why the heck didn't our biomed grader find and inform us of this problem two weeks ago when she saw our outline instead of waiting till now when work and stress is at its max. But hopefully I'll finish compiling everything soon and we'll be set. Just very frustrating long week this week. And now we've gotta prepare a final presentation too. Ooooh goody! Least presentations are my specialty lol.

In other news I had to just say Jeff is amazing and wonderful as always. He really means so much to me and just the littlest things about him or the things that he does make all the difference in the world. Two weekends ago he got me a giant Funshine care bear. *giant grin* She's so cute and he was so cute for getting it for me....took most of his tickets at Dave and Busters. Then this past weekend he went with me to the Pink Floyd laser concert with my dad, sister, Mary, and her sister Brigid. Yeah I did in fact say Pink Floyd. Not my type of music particularly but my dad and sister really wanted to go and it was here in Philly so I said I would take them. It's not particularly Jeff's kind of music either nor is the excessive lser lights that make you think you must be high during the show. But he came with us and kept me company and made the night so much better just by being there. And my family really likes him too....even Marley! I was thrilled. This is a really good thing considering our summer plans now.

Guess who's goin on a Greek Cruise for graduation!!??!?!?1 YAY! I'm sooo sooo sooo excited. I've always wanted to go to Greece and see the Parthenon and the Acropolis. But now here's the best part. Jeff's coming with us!! My dad invited him to join us AND he's currently booked Jeff and I in a room together *gasp* In all actuality it's the best way to handle sleeping arrangements that have to be 2 per room. My brother and sister would make much better roommies than Marley and I with Jeff and Cory would. But that's a big step for my dad. He really does like Jeff and he trusts us which means a lot to me. My dad's very picky when it comes to guys dating his daughters. But Jeff he's taken quite a liking to. :-) This is very good considering the fact that I love Jeff. He's really the most amazing thing that's come into my life and I'm so lucky to have him. I swear just looking over and seeing him smiling at me makes me feel so wonderful. I dunno, I just think he's wonderful and I coouldn't be any luckier. I have the best boyfriend ever! So yes we are officially taking a Greek cruise with my family come July. Oooooh so exciting and such a great way to end my long and difficult 5 years at Drexel. I'll graduate, have some time to resituate and prepare for the working world, take our tour to Greece which will take up practically two weeks in travel to Richmond and back as well as some lay over time touring Venice!! :-) And then start working at Merck full time. What more could a girl ask for?? I don't think I ever imagined things would end this well when I first started college. Good to know all that hard work paid off. :-) Anyways, back to finishin up senior design I go. The sooner this is all over with the closer I get to Greece. *still grinning like crazy*

:-)

2006-01-10T01:17:44Z

So there's been a ton of holiday fun and celebration and as usual I have failed to update at all. Which isn't entirely my fault as I left my laptop power cord at home and it had to be fed-exed back up to me here at school but minor detail really!

So Christmas break was wonderful. I got to go home and spend some nice time with family and friends at home as well which was really really great. And then Jeff came down to spend Christmas with my family, which couldn't have been better. It was really nice getting to spend Christmas day with him. And surprisingly enough my crazy family didn't scare him away which is also very very good news :-)

We then came back up on the 26th to spend some time with his family for Christmas which was also nice. So I got to meet pretty much the rest of his family. They were all really nice and it was great getting to meet them. Overall, I think we both had a wonderful holiday and got to spend some time with both of our families together which makes it even better. He did like my Flyers tickets which made my day for sure and the necklace he got me has a pink heart in it which I absolutely adore and will pretty much be wearing always ;-) So all in all we both managed to surprise the other for Christmas.

New Years was spent up here at George and Meaghan's. It was my first New Years in Philly which was kind of exciting actually and I couldn't have picked a better group to spend it with! :-) We had more than enough champaigne and plenty of games and laughs. Plus, fireworks at midnight who can argue with that!? Hehehe it was really great.

Then to top everything off, as of today I am officially old as I turned 23 yesterday. Least everyone keeps telling me I'm old. I dunno I don't feel too old yet which has to be a good thing. Had a lot of phone calls and messages yesterday which was really sweet. I felt very loved so thank you everyone! :-) Jeff also treated me to a wonderful day. I got to sleep in late and then he took me out for blueberry pancakes for brunch I guess. But they were oooooh so yummy! :-) We then spent the afternoon finishing up a mystery puzzle I got for Christmas which was great fun. Although neither one of us fully solved the mystery. Either way the putting the puzzle together was fun and I have to admit it's really nice being able to enjoy doing something like that with the one you love. Even if we did fight over who got to put the last piece in. ;-) Ooooh and Jeff also got my this wonderfully warm and cute pink bathrobe which I am currently wearing cause it's super warm and just the right color. Hehehe he's so wonderful. So yes, had a most wonderful birthday all in all even if I am old.

Unfortunately, today it was back to classes. But hey only 2 more terms to go and then I'm done! Woohoo! And this term isn't looking to be too too horrific really. And besides we get next Monday off apparently. This was quite a pleasant surprise this morning especially seeing how Mondays are the worst days of the week for me. Yahoo! So somehow I think I'll make it through. My goal is to just stay on Dean's List and graduate as soon as possible. Yup yup! That's all I need. :-) Anyhoo, just figured I'd update this thing a lil. I'm sure the term will get crazy again soon enough but I am trying to be better about updating. We'll see how long that lasts. For now time to relax some. :-)

He loves me! :-)

2005-11-29T06:12:58Z

Wow it's been quite a while since I've updated and the past two weeks or so have definately been pretty great. All the more reason to update I suppose.

So the weekend before Thanksgiving Jeff and I headed up to New York City for the weekend to see Spamalot, an early birthday present from my daddy. Apparently Tim Curry leaves in December so if I was to see it as it was originally meant to be seen I would have to go asap. So he got us some pretty great tickets to see the show. We discovered how to take the train up to New York much faster, cheaper, easier, overall amazingly better than driving to New York. Jeff's so smart! ;-) So we got up there pretty early, threw our stuff into the hotel and headed out to see the Statue of Liberty. We were very sad to discover that getting there at around 2 on a Saturday was too late to be able to even go up part way up the Statue as they have no apparently closed walking to the top due to terorrism, which I find really stupid in and of itself. But regardless, that meant there was no point to taking the ferry across to the island as it was $15 and all we'd be able to do is look up and say yup there it is and then head back. So we wandered over to Wall Street and checked out the stock market area, which is fairly unexciting but still pretty cool to see. We then continued our trend of brillance and figured out how to take the subway around the city lol. We headed up to the central park area to hit FAO for some Christmas shopping which was fun. We had an absolutely delicous pizza dinner at a nice place Jeff found and then headed over to Rockafeller Center to ice skate till midnight! Hehehe it was so much fun. Although I must say it's a much smaller space than you realize. So it was crowded but nonetheless quite fun and really nice. We then finished the night off with some cheesecake and a drink. Got up early the next morning and did one of the things I've always wanted to do in New York but never done. We took a carriage ride through central park!! Ooooh it was sooooo nice! I love horses and we had a cute lil blanket to keep us warm. Definitely nice and romantic. :-)

Then of course we finished off our trip with seeing Spamalot. I must say it was absolutely hilarious!! I loved it. I was a lil worried that Jeff having never seen Monty Python would be confused and not like it but I think he enjoyed it just as much. And I must say Tim Curry does quite well as does David Hyde Pierce. And honestly the role of the Lady of the Lake was amazing. My favorite song I think has to be the Diva's Lament: What Happened to My Part? Hehehe soooo good. I thanked my daddy profusely. Anyone who can go see the show I highly recommend it. David Hyde Pierce will still be there for a while and he's great too. :-)

Thanksgiving break was busy but really nice. I ended up staying up here to do Thanksgiving with Jeff and his family. I think it had to have been the first time I didn't go home so I missed my family a little but his family was wonderful and we had a really nice dinner here. We had gone up to Madison Square Gardens on Wednesday to see the Drexel basketball team give Duke a good run for their money in the NIT tournament. And he got to play with the band again which as very cool. So we had that and then Thanksgiving day with his family. It was so nice to actually have turkey on Thanksgiving and like I said his family's wonderful. I had such a nice time, I'm glad I got to spend it with Jeff and his family. Then Friday began the epic battle of building a shed in Jeff's backyard. We still didn't finish on Sunday but it's almost finished and looks amazing. I was very impressed that Jeff was able to build it with the help of his dad, brother, grandfather, and me whenever I could help. He even let me play with power tools! :-) But seriously he knew his stuff and I think made an even better shed than the instructions would have one make. He's so amazing he really is.

And on a final note my closing highlight for the break came Saturday night/Sunday morning when Jeff and I both said three pretty big words to each other. We said I love you for the first time. And it was wonderful and I've been grinning ever since! :-) I know it may sound simple but it's a really big deal to me and just hearing him say that meant the world to me. I really am so lucky to have him in my life. He's amazing and wonderful and I could go on and on. So I'll spare you and just end it by saying I love him. :-)

So all in all an amazing last few weeks. It's so sad to have to go back to school for another three weeks. But I'll get through and Christmas break will be here before I know it. Although that also means I better get going on Christmas shopping. Oooh that's so much fun! Hehehehe but I think this entry's gotten long enough for now and I should prolly get some sleep. But yay! Very happy Brandi aside from dealing with stupid classes. So I'll end for now with an appropriate quote:

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." ~Moulin Rouge

Pondering

2005-10-11T15:46:50Z

So last night I was reading my sappy love story: The Notebook. I absolutely loved that movie and figured I'd read the book now. It's well worth it I must say. Anyways, I got to reading it last night and everything that was happening was just so sweet and wonderful I started crying. I couldn't help it. And I rolled over in my bed and looked at the picture of Jeff and I on my wall and just smiled.

We had a really nice weekend together this weekend. He truly is amazing. Never would have thought things would turn out this way but I'm so glad they have. I've really been blessed to have him in my life. Whenever I'm with him I can't help but smile. Having his arms around me just makes me feel so safe and comfortable, I never wanna leave. He's the only guy I feel like I can talk to about anything and everything...and I do. And he makes me feel so special. It's just little things he says and does that make everything all worthwhile. He takes me to hockey games and explains the rules to me as we watch, he wants to share in doing things with me even if it's just yardwork, he makes dinner....just everything. And the fact that I wanna spend time with him doing anything. I never would have gone to a hockey game if it wasn't for Jeff. And I have to admit it was actually pretty cool. I enjoyed the game honestly. The Phantoms scored the tieing goal with 2 seconds left on the clock! I was shocked. It's just things like that, that we can share with each other that make me feel so special and so loved.

I've never been very good at expressing emotions like these to the guy I care about before. My dating history hasn't exactly been the greatest. And the way I've been treated before doesn't really encourage me to throw my emotions out on the table right away. But I guess there's also never been a guy quite like Jeff before either. When I'm with him there are times when I don't even feel like we have to say anything at all. The way we act or treat each other says it all. And that's an incredible feeling to have. To just know how we feel, not needing to express it. That kind of relationship is the kind I've always wanted. It just makes me happy now to think about Jeff and I. :-)

And I guess that's what happened last night as I was reading my book. Just happy feelings I guess. And the realization that maybe there are things I should tell him. Or at least one particular thing I know I feel that I should tell him...

Anyways, I will stop rambling for now and just leave you with some song lyrics that I've been listening to lately. It's a beautiful song and the rest of the music on the cd is equally good. My sister recommended it to me originally. Keith Urban has such beautiful lyrics and music. Everyone should go listen to this song if they get a chance. Or at least the girls. ;-)

And I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you
And I'll earn your trust making memories of us

We'll follow the rainbow
Wherever the four winds blow
And there'll be a new day
Comin' your way

I'm gonna be here for you from now on
~Keith Urban "Making Memories of Us"

:-)

2005-09-29T16:50:20Z

So I officially got 2, not one but 2 Merck job offers for right after I graduate!! :-) Looks like I'll be staying in the area after all ;-) Just had to share....for now back to work and waiting for the HR guy to get back to me and explain what the second job offer is for considerin I never interviewed with that department. Hehehehe so excited! :-)

Yay!

2005-08-26T17:21:07Z

So I finally got some free time to at least do the meme thingy everyone else was doing. I've been such a loser all stressed out with work this week. I will actually do a legit post later, just killin time now till I have to go meet up with Kevin and turn in my last project/assignment for the term before finals next week. Term's almost over!! WOOOHOO!

The Random Question Meme!

An array of completely random questions about my friends!

What's the biggest difference between roguebelle and ducttapechick?: Prolly the fact that ducttapechick is in Philly and goes to Drexel with me (one of my little's in fact!) and roguebelle is in Virginia at William and Mary and went to high school with me. But they're both great girls!
What animal does starlight1112 most remind you of?: Hmmm Riley would remind me of a cute lil chick I think. So cute and talkative!
What is the most embarrassing thing you know about marstewart?: Hahaha oh wouldn't everyone like to know this one?? I swear Mary shows up in my questionaire but not me in hers mwuahahahahaha!

Ummm right answering the question....how bout goin with seeing her at one of her drunkest moments in our apartment?
Did melitami take the blue pill, or the red pill?: Must remember the difference between pills....how bout both cause then maybe takin both would magically fix all of her ailments and let her sleep peacefully and eat whatever she wants! *nods happily*
Is whereiszoph an innie or an outie?: I'm gonna guess innie cause there's a higher prevelence of those but that's just the biologist in me talkin. I have no clue....Christoph are you an innie??
dreester1121: ninja, pirate, monkey, or robot?: Hmmm I think I'm gonna go with ninja cause those are fun!
What does echochild78 spend the most time doing?: LARPing??
What will be gleidus's last words?: Nathan's last words....that's a really tough question. How bout "I love you" to his family/friends/wife? Should be happy final words.
Who would make a better stuffed animal, italstalta or gap27?: HAHAHAHA! I find this question hilarious and the choices even more so. I dunno if I can choose tho, Tom and George would both make oh so cute and huggable stuffed animals! Although George I do keep flashing back to that convention picture of you cheerfully bouncing the tickle me elmo stuff animal ;-)
Would hroguewolf look better not wearing pants, or not wearing a shirt?: Ummmm....I'm gonna go with not wearing a shirt cause really Hoover you can keep your pants on. ;-)

This is by heptadecagram. You can find your own completely random questions here.

Do you feel enlightened now?

So happy....best boyfriend ever

2005-08-05T01:25:11Z

So it's been a while since I've posted and a lot of stuff has been goin on. I'm not sure how far I'll get through everything to update but I'll give it a try and there will be more to come after next week.

So to start it off this past weekend Jeff joined me on a trip up to New York to see Chitty-Chitty Bang Bang for one thing and to meet my parents. I think he was a lil nervous about meeting them but really anyone who's met my dad knows there's absolutely nothing to worry about. So we battled through epic amounts of New York traffic to eventually get up there. The drive wasn't too bad but I was really glad to have Jeff with me. He's so good at directions! Hehehehe. So we got there and had a late dinner with my parents.

We got up early on Saturday and I think must have literally walked around everywhere in New York! It was really cool actually I've been there so many times but yet we still found neat fun things to check out. We hit ground zero which is now surprisingly clear and then walked over to the Brooklyn Bridge which he wanted to see. I've studied it a bunch so it was nice to finally see what all I had been talkin about lol. We hiked up about 1/4 the way up and got a cute picture of us there. The view of the city was amazing. From there it was over to China town where Jeff had his first bubble tea and a real one at that. I don't think he liked the bubbles much but the tea was really good. On through Little Italy which we completely missed lol! And then some shoppin and such and back to the hotel for showers and to prepare for the show.

All in all I must say Chitty-Chitty Bang Bang was much better than I expected. Holds the record now for the most expensive prop ever made for a show. And I can see why!! That car was amazing! And honestly the show was really really cute and incredibly well done. I loved the evil Vulgarian Baron and his wife they were hilarious. But my highlight of the show had to be the live dogs running across the stage for Toot-Sweets and the poor lil poodle who got confused and decided to run back across the stage during the next scene. I'm pretty sure that one was accidental but oh so cute! The two evil hencemen were pretty hilarious as well. Acting wise the show wasn't phenomenal but set-wise, special affects, attention to detail, and overall spectacle made it well worth the show. I would recommend it for a fun afternoon. We then had Carmine's for dinner with my parents *drools* Such amazingly good food. And to finish off the evening Jeff and I headed for the Empire State Building to look out over the city at night. Only much to our dismay they closed it early due to over crowding :-(. So we ended up walkin around a lil bit. Jeff was so sweet though as we're walkin around he sees one of the lil street vendors selling the name designs on a posterboard thingy. He got me one of my name that's written in green and white paint to look like bamboo with lil panda bears peaking out of each letter!! It's so cute! I made sure to hang it up on my wall already. :-)

Sunday was then spent back at the Empire State Building waiting thru the 2 hour lines for a beautiful view up top. Then we walked around Central Park and some of the stores up there including FAO Schwarz, Trump Tower, and Tiffanys. It was really nice and honestly I just loved being with Jeff. :-) However, sadly we ended up getting stuck in traffic on the drive home which meant I wasn't able to make it back to the Pi Nu meeting in time. Oooopsy. *makes mental note to leave more time for traffic when travelin to and from New York from now on* But all in all a very wonderful weekend. My parents adored Jeff, I had a wonderful time with him there, and I think he really had a good time too.

Now on to the reason my subject is as it is. So we got back from New York fairly late and by the time I got to bed on Sunday night it was about 10 pm. Now normally this wouldn't be a bad thing at all except for the fact that my massive Merck Super Day was Monday morning. This required me to be up and outta bed by 4 am in order to drive to West Point (where I worked before) and then get on a bus to ride for 2 hours over to Cokesbury for 5 hours of intense interviews followed by a 3 hour drive back in total. So needless to say I was not happy about havin to get up at 4 am. So my alarm goes off at 4 and I end up turning it off and still kinda laying there which is BAD! VERY VERY BAD! But about two minutes later my cell phone rings and I force myself outta the bed to answer. Sure enough it's Jeff making sure I'm up and telling me good luck. How wonderfully amazing is that!!? He actually set his alarm for that early just to make sure I got up in time for my interviews. I couldn't help but smile through the entire morning struggle of getting over there just thinking, wow he really is the best boyfriend ever! :-)

Interviews all in all I think went very well though very long and tedious. And I can confidently say that cause the next morning I got a call from the Bioprocesses department asking me to come back for more specific interviews next week meaning I had passed round 1 and they really wanted to see me again for the final round before formal job offers are made in September. AHHHH!! I soooo hope I get a job offer. It would be amazing to not have to worry about finding a job for when I graduate. And especially to have a job all lined up at Merck of all places. I'll still go to the job fairs and see what's goin on but really who could argue with a full time offer from Merck. *crosses her fingers* I just gotta impress the 9 other people who are gonna be interviewin me next week. Yes, that's right 9 interviews including one over lunch! Sheesh, I'm gonna be dead by the end of it all. But here's hopin....more on that subject to come.

So yeah....that's the status of things for right now. Things with classes are goin well and life pretty much continues to be pretty wonderful all in all. Oh yeah, I did get double cast in the studio shows for this fall. So that's more fun news. Now I just gotta learn to be a lil better about balancing my schedule. Minor detail really. But I really really am so very happy it's rediculous. Never really had a guy before that makes me feel as wonderful as Jeff does constantly. I just look at him or think about him and smile. This is really the way a good relationship is supposed to work. Wow....really nice to know there are still those good guys out there. ;-) Ok I'll stop rambling now just wanted to update things a lil bit.

"Let's enjoy the view and neverland" ~Some Things Are Meant to Be

2005-06-23T04:01:19Z

I do love this song and after talking to Monica today it just keeps popping back up. We had a really nice conversation today before she falls into Michigan and the days of old where only letters can communicate. But our conversation made me realize a lot of big things and that I ought to update my journal lol! So here goes:

Basically, through our conversation we came to the realization that for the first time after so long in my life everything seems to really be going well and that somehow all of my dreams just may come true. I dunno that seems cliche but anyone who's known me for as long as Monica has, knows it hasn't been an easy trail for me nor her for that matter. Monica and I were always each other's rock through the constant storms of our lives. It was amazing how we were always there even if we were miles and miles apart. I won't ever be able to explain it in words but we just connect and we'll always be there. Those friendships are rare and precious. Only a few others have reached those same levels and I think most of them know who they are ;-)

But back to our conversation today. It's really true, I can honestly say that I am completely, 100% happy with my life and where I'm headed. I'm making it through classes better than ever (working my ass off for it, but I always thrive better under stress) and am coming up to my senior year looking pretty good. I may even have a senior design team plan which would be wonderful.

To continue on with education things with Merck seem quite optimistic. Bonnie has definately made it clear that she would love to have me come back to the cancer research department with everyone which I would absolutely love! I'm keepin in touch with some hiring people over the summer and will hopefully have a major interview by September for a full time position at Merck. *crosses her fingers* I oh so badly want to go and cure cancer one day!

Moving on, my health has been much better than it was in high school, no massive stress induced stomach pains, no major migraines....plenty of stress but it's almost the good kind of stress I think. Or at least I'm handling it much better now. ;-)

Things with my family still may not be perfect, but I've accepted them. And even better I'm dealing with them worlds better than I used to. I'm stronger and determined now. Yes, things still hurt, but now I know how to handle things better and we're still fighting towards the right direction. If my dad gets this new job things are REALLY gonna get better. And then even further my mother is finally cancer free. I am honestly so proud of her. I've always said I admire my mother's strength, determination, and achievements. I still do and can continue to say I wanna grow up to be just like my mother with the exception of a few minor flaws. And that means a lot to me and it also means the world to me to know that she still loves talkin to me as much as I love talking to her. I will always be a mommy's girl and a daddy's girl for that matter but people have always laughed at the strong connection I have with my mother and thought it incredibly adorable that I at 22 years of age still call her mommy. And I continue to say "HA! My mommy's tough stuff, she kicked breast cancer's butt!" And should the same fate befall me, I know she'll be right by my side fighting with me. I'm just glad to know that the future still holds a place for my mother. I don't know what I would do if she weren't around to see me walk down the aisle, see my children, travel with me and my family as we've always planned, and be there to confide in for always.

I have amazing friends that I am always eternally grateful for, a fantastic place to live, and to complete my picture a new boyfriend as well.....well at least I think so. Everyone else tells me he's totally my boyfriend but it would still be nice to hear him actually use that term. I don't mind waiting tho. But I think everyone's pretty much right ;-) But it's really nice, he's sweet and treats me like a princess. It's been years since I've felt that and I must admit that there have been times when I've doubted I'd get my happily ever after. And ya know, even if Jeff isn't Mr. Right in the end he's at least brought me back into the world and made me more confident in myself. And I have to say I adore him for taking things slow, for bein so good to me, and for making me remember just how wonderful it is to have a guy reach for your hand. So I've been very very happy. And now I'll stop gushing for everyone else's sake.

I know life is never perfect, but I really have that feeling for the first time that my life is really and truly heading in the right direction. All of my hard work, blood, sweat, tears, and pain is going to pay off. I guess I've always believed that but after so many years not feeling it one can't help but have doubts. I know no matter what that I've been truly blessed in my life and I will never forget that. It's just really nice to feel that everything is falling into place. And it's funny, things haven't gone exactly as I may have planned them or dreamed them when I was younger....but somehow it just all feels.....so right. :-)

Alright, I know I'm not good at updating but hopefully that one will do for a while now. I'll try and be better about it. I just couldn't help but share my thoughts after that conversation with Monica. For now I think I shall head on to bed. Immunology bright and early in the morning, but it's just more work reading for that final goal. I dunno....I'm just so content now. :::happy sigh:::

sigh of relief

2005-02-23T20:11:54Z

Well, I figured it's been forever since I've posted anything and 50 billion things have come and gone but I actually have a lil free time so might as well write somethin huh? ;-)

Family is doing well, I was really glad to go home and see everyone this past weekend. Got to have some sister-sister time with Marley which was excellent although our discussions this weekend officially verified the fact that I am indeed a goody-goody but I sure as hell better be married first! ;-) My mom is also doing well. She's halfway thru her chemo treatments and has literally no white blood cells but she's still goin strong. She always amazes me, that's why I wanna grow up and be just like her! :-)

As far as school and various such other things go. I've finally gotten my schedule set and it's very happy. No classes till noon running to around 3/4ish with one night class. I'm psyched! And I definately think I'm ready to go back to classes again. Not that I don't adore working for Merck cause I totally do, but it's one of those "I'll be here in a year or two for real can I just go back to college now please?" feelings.

As for fun in my life, things with the theatre weren't looking so hot at the end of last week but I have since spoken to Adelle and Kristin and gotten a lot of things worked out which makes this actress very, very happy. Adelle really complimented me on my read for Frau Schneider and informed me that I had improved drastically over the past year which definately at least made me feel somewhat more confident in my auditioning skills. She also supplemented my disappointment in not getting the role I had wanted with a small solo in Cabaret. So yes, I'm very much looking forward to singing with Jason come this Thursday to learn the song and to finally be in my first musical at Drexel! It's been a while since I've gotten to be in a musical (OH how I miss Fort Lee!!) so it'll be nice. I also spoke to both Adelle and Kristin about auditioning for the studio shows as well since I really would still like to act this term. The role in Cabaret is predominantly a singing role with my appearing in a few additional scenes as an audience member for the Kit Kat club so adding in some acting would just completely fill this picture. :-) Besides, all I really wanted was to be allowed to audition for the studios. Kristin and Gina are amazing people to work with and I'd love the opportunity to work with them in a studio show. And fortunately for me, my role in Cabaret as well as my one night class should not inhibit my ability to do a studio show, so if I can manage to impress the directors I could potentially add that in for the spring as well. This just all makes me very very happy!! Things always seem to have a strange way of working out in the end I suppose. Plus, all of this leaves me more time for Pi Nu and other things that I wouldn't have had as much time for had I gotten Frau in Cabaret. So yes indeedy. Very happy Brandi!! :-)

Whew, also a very tired Brandi who needs to finish up some data analysis stuffage before she goes home to have one more evening of fun with Christopher McKinney. We had a delicous UnValentines Day dinner last night at Maggianos and he gave me a gorgous pink lilly that's sitting on our kitchen table to top it all off. :::sigh::: Feeling much less stressed and more peaceful now.

Oooh oooh yay!

2004-12-02T18:01:52Z

Ok, ok so I also tied for Erato like Mary (we all know I'm the sappy romantic one as well) but I really like Urania too :-)

You scored as Urania. You are Urania, the muse of the heavens and astronomy. You are very thoughtful, but so thoughtful that it sometimes hinders you. You also have an uncanny ability to know something out of the ordinary will happen.

</td>

Erato

69%

Urania

69%

Terpischore

62%

Euterpe

62%

Melpomene

62%

Polyhymnia

56%

Thalia

50%

Calliope

50%

Clio

38%

Which of the Greek Muses are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Yay for Thanksgiving Break

2004-11-23T14:35:47Z

Ok, so I've got an hour incubation on my cells drug treatment. So I figured I'd do a lil update considering I haven't for a while. Things are going pretty well up here anyways. I love being in two shows at once and auditioning for a third one next week. My roommates are fabulous, especially when we throw last minute game nights into the mix with great fun playing Pit and laughing. Yeah last night was really good. Mary and I cooked the most yummy dinner ever, cause *gasp* we both were home for dinner!! I know it's hard to believe but it actually happened! So it was nice to sit down to dinner with her, even if all this lousy cook could contribute was a can of pinapple to the meal. I'm learnin tho I swear! And Pit before bedtime just made me more awake and alert today in order to drive home....

Speaking of driving home, I get to leave work today, prolly around 2/2:30ish if all goes well to jump onto 95 and cruise. Least I'm hopin to cruise all the way down to Richmond. We'll see how well this goes, but hey at least it's not Wednesday one of the most traveled days of the year! I'm really looking forward to going home though. For some reason I know I badly need the break and I really think my family needs me.

Is it selfish to note that whenever I go home things magically seem to get better?? I mean, I've always been the type to wanna fix things, and get everyone else happy especially before myself. Anyone who knows me can attest to that. But I dunno somehow whenever I hear things are crappy at home, I get in my car and head back and everyone just comes alive. I get my sister outta Richmond talking to me now (we're real sisters now I love it!!), my brother comes back to the house more frequently than normal, my mom stops drinking and having panick attacks, and my dad makes a bigger effort to stay at home more, make us waffles for breakfast, and actually hang out and spend time with his whole family. Least that's the way it was last weekend, and I've noticed it happening quite a bit in the past year. Not to the large extent it was the last weekend I went home (we needed it desperately) but it definately happens. Kinda makes me feel really good in a way. Like somehow I'm that missing link whenever things go wrong. I guess it's a comfort to really see that all of my effort thru the years has really paid off. My family really is wonderful despite our problems and flaws....yes I admit there are plenty. But ya know I've learned from those flaws and fixed them in myself preparing to be the best mother I can be one day. Realizing how happy my presence makes my family and home life in general really does encourage me. Even if Mary says I'm not domesticated enough. ;-)

Ok, sorry for the slight tangent...just was thinking about that some last night and this morning too. I'm very excited to go home needless to say. But it's only for a short time and then I shall be back rejuvenated for Philly life again. Auditions for "The Good Doctor" and plenty of play rehearsals to smack me upside the head next Monday when I return....but I think then they're going to be welcomed. And honestly I hope to spend more time with my roommies and friends after the break. I look forward to things really starting to look up in Pi Nu thanks to some wonderful efforts made by all. And hey best of all when I get back from break I can begin Christmas shopping!!! Ooooooh I love Christmas! Gotta go out and start finding the perfect pressies for everyone this year since I actually am making decent money. Alrighty, I think I've babbled enough, time to update my lab notebook and prepare for my second cell drug treatment.

Joinin the band wagon

2004-11-22T18:49:02Z

You Are Mashed Potatoes

Oridnary, comforting, and more than a little predictable
You're the glue that holds everyone together.

What Part of Thanksgiving Are You?

It's supposed to be another manic Monday...

2004-11-15T15:53:29Z

So yes, the boredom has set in again and I figured I would post a couple other things and happier ones too. For starters I had a very nice weekend. I got to hang out with Ashley and Chris, my old roommies and very good friends for dinner and a movie on Friday night. Finally saw the Stepford Wives. Quite an amusing movie. Very different from the original though....however I'm sure I'm the only one out there who has 1. Seen the original and 2. Knows and has seen the sequals the Stepford Husbands and Stepford Children. I recommend the original but not the other two. ;-) The original film was much more serious and took the stance of this could really happen one day, look how awful it is rather than the more amusing side to things and almost unrealisticness of this newer one.

Then Saturday just like my roommies did later I cleaned up my room. It looks all pretty now and I got to hang up my newly framed Chinese painting. I love it! I can still remember walkin through China commenting on how 2 birds symbolize love which they do!! And my pretty silk painting shows that as well as the Chinese national flower. Now I just gotta hang up my entire script of MacBeth and my angels painting if Mary will let me find a place to put it up. ;-)

Saturday night was spent on a hayride with a ton of older friends including Ashley, Ed, Chris, Jason, and many others. We had about 30 some people all squeezed together huddled for warmth. It was soooooo incrediblely cold!!! I had Ashley behind me, Brenden on my left, and a new person I had just met on my left....oh wait someone was at my feet keepin my legs warm too, I forget who. But it was sooo beautiful out looking up at the stars and Brenden and I were having a fabulous Broadway conversation so life was definately good. After the hayride we had hotdogs and roasted marshmellows for smores. I love campfires! Although we couldn't stay out very long, we'd make our smores and then run back to the lil shed with the space heater to return to somewhat reasonable temperatures. And then go back out and do it again....so if I wind up with a cold this week I'll know why lol. But then we got to do some singing around the campfire and just relaxing. It really made me miss camping with my family. But I'm so glad I went and got to have so much fun with everyone. I miss those people. My schedule gets so crazy sometimes and so do theirs that we rarely get to see one another. It was really nice.

Then Sunday came, and I helped Adelle answer performing arts questions at the open house and then had "Interview" rehearsal with her as well. Things are getting better with the show....still have a lot of work to go but I'm totally remaining optimistic. Then I went out to a most yummy dinner with Mary and George and we talked over a lot of things that have been going on. So now it's on to operation "Let's Fix Pi Nu!" Well....I dunno if that's what we're callin it, but we're totally getting things going and the rest of this term is really gonna be fantastic. After dinner we rushed over to see the Incredibles and as Mary said in her entry it was SOOOOO GOOD!! Hehehehehe I love comic book superheros and Disney films so combining the true in a way cute funny film just made it all the better. I highly recommend it and am totally in if anyone else wants to go see it. Then after the movie and a chocolate run I eventually got some sleep and see my previous entry for where I'm at now with work. Soooooo bored....I wish I could go do lunch with people Ok I'm done now I promise :-)

"It's just another manic Monday..."

2004-11-15T14:30:18Z

UGH! I don't think I've ever had a Monday start out as badly as this one did today. So I got a call late last night from Morgan (one of the girls I co-op with who drives half the time in our carpool) saying she parked her car in a bad spot and the windshield broke. So she needed me to drive into work this morning *Insert big humungous groan here* I drove aaaaaaaaaall last week, I'm really tired, I don't want to! But what did I say?? Sure, no problem.

So I sucked it up and got up this morning. To start things off I still can't find my gloves (they must be at home STUPID PACKING!) so I had to get into an icy car and put my hands on the steering wheel eeeeep! Then I show up to pick up Shawn (nondriver) who is in fact late *begins to grumble* Then I go to pick up Morgan and she's freakin late too! *really starts to get ticked* So now we're about 15 mins late leaving for work, I'm tired and cranky, and really just wanna be napping myself since it's supposed to be my week off. I shrug it off and try and talk to Morgan some in order to keep myself awake. Yeah that didn't last long...eventually both she and Shawn fall asleep leaving me to force my eyes open by themselves. This was not a good plan at all. Needless to say Brandi's eyes were definately opening and closing and I most definately got off on the wrong exit this morning and had to turn around and get myself back onto 476 like I was supposed to go. Grrrrr! So grouchy now and very sleepy. And to make matters worse my boss still won't be back until Wednesday so....yup that's right now much to do today either. I'm gonna seed my cells and wait for the to grow up and try and start an experiment tomorrow and get ahead on things. I think....Yeah so totally leave fun happy messages to keep me awake and entertained today!! :-) Will make another entry about the wonders that was my weekend in a lil bit....gotta space out my time here today ;-)

Update

2004-11-12T16:05:04Z

So yeah it's rainy and cold and generally icky outside and I'm stuck in my office with nothing to do b/c my boss is out for the day and forgot to give me work *pouts* Wait a sec...I'm complaining about not having work to do!? Yeah....yeah I am, I'm just that pathetic.

Anyhoo, I figured I'd make a general update on things at the moment since a lot of stuff has been happening and I've kinda shut down and not talked much about it all. Let's start with the negative first and then I'll move on to the more positive things...

1. Last week my family found out that my mother has breast cancer. Fortunately, she found it herself, it was early and had not spread anywhere. Took the doctors long enough to get that info to her SO needless to say I went home for the weekend to help her cope, help my brother and sister cope, and help my father. It was really scary there for a while and everyone was so upset and so scared. Proud to say for the first time ever I swallowed my fear and pain and was able to go home and just really bring everyone together to talk and to cheer up. I didn't let myself get dragged down into the pit of misery as I did do in high school especially when things were bad and alcohol was involved as it of course resurfaced this time as well. So yes, the weekend home was good and even better my mother saw a doctor on Tuesday and he told her that everything will be ok...they caught it early and even better can just surgically remove the cancer itself rather than a whole breast. *Huge sigh of relief from everyone* That doesn't mean the battles over, but hearing the doctor say the rate of recurrance after all is said and done is anywhere from 3-12% is much happier than the previous thought 50%. So yes, my mom will go in for surgery right after Thanksgiving (this year's family gathering is going to be amazingly happy, upbeat, and really really tight knit now I know it!). She'll then have 4-6 weeks off before she has to do a series of 5 radiation treatments a week for 5 weeks leaving a perfect gap in there for Christmas, my sister's birthday, and mine as well (hopefully she and my dad can come see my shows!! *big grin*). So yes, scary times but my blood pressure is down again, no more panic attacks, and now it's just time to really be there for my mother whom I really really love talking to and spending time with anyways. :-)

2. As commented on my previous post I did in fact get offered a contract with a modeling/acting group called the Alpha Model Group. And yes, after much talking to the guy and an exact amount of how much things were gonna cost me and what I'd get out of it....I signed a contract *gasp* It's a non-exclusive contract so it's non binding and I get a full professional photo portfolio outta the deal which I can then take around anywhere else I want. I still have 2 more days to change my mind if I want to but I'm honestly really excited about all of this. I talked it over with my parents and they both are like, "Are you kidding me!!? Go for it! We've spent more money on stupider things before..." This coming from my mother, the Queen of responsibility, frugalness with money, and careful planning. So yeah...I think I'm gonna go for it. If nothing else it's really exciting to know that I was picked as one of 15 or so outta 97 people who showed up for the open call and THEY PICKED ME!! :-) I have a training course after Thanksgiving and the Photo shoot with hairstylist and make-up artist has been scheduled for January 8th....WAIT NOOOOOOO!!! That date is of course the one day I can't in fact be here for my photo shoot. For starters it's my birthday, but second of all that's the day my dad (being the wonderful, amazing dad is he) got tickets for me to go see not 1 but 2 Broadway shows. EEEP! So I talked to my agent and he said it was no problem at all. He's gonna talk to the photographer and see if we can schedule a different time. Maybe even Friday before I leave for New York but leaving enough time in there for me to make it to the final performance of the fall studio shows. Essssh, I'm cutting things close. But yeah so that's my new exciting news!! I'm actually gonna be out there trying for modeling and professional acting in commercials, movies, tv shows, etc. It's just something on the side but still, how cool is that!? My new goal....to be the voice of the next Disney Princess (or cute girl whichever comes first ;-)

Ok....I think that's everything that's been going on with me for right now. And I've only got a lil bit longer to wait till lunch break sets in. This afternoon at least I can split all of my cell cultures to be ready to do stuff next week. Gotta take good care of my cells....got new reasons now to hurry up on my first goal of curing cancer! ;-)

Me!? A Model???

2004-11-10T17:45:13Z

Ok, so I only have a few minutes to throw up a post before I have to get back to taking care of my cells. But I just got off the phone with an agent from the Alpha Model Group. He wants me to sign a contract with them TONIGHT! It's non exclusive and all that but yikes this is kinda sudden for me. It's also kinda expensive since I'll have to get professional photos done to start submitting to people out there for modeling, acting, commercials, etc. And by kinda expensive we're talkin about $500-600 when all is said and done. The guy said he loved my smile and face....I dunno....any thoughts out there?? I'd totally make the money back with like 2 or 3 acting gigs really and my dad told me I should go for it if I talk to the guy tonight and he honestly sees some promise in me. HELP! What should I do? I'll talk to him tonight for sure but I'll also have to sign a contract AND make a starting downpayment on pics....thoughts?

:::sigh:::

2004-11-04T20:46:08Z

So it's official. I'm cutting out of rehearsal this Sunday and driving home to see my family or more specifically my mommy. I think she was close to tears when I called home today to tell her I wanted to come home. She had no idea I was even thinking about it. But that reaction is exactly the reason why I'm going. It will be really good for her I think and really good for my own sanity.

*Note- If you don't know why I need to go home and see my mother IM me or call me separately and I shall talk I don't feel like discussing it here. I'm still kinda shaky on the whole thing really.

As for the past week/weekend. Roller coaster and a half I tell ya. But I think I'll sum it up quickly in musical quotes cause really that's the best way to do it and not be overly emotional about anything.

"There's a fine, fine line
Between love and a waste of your time
And I don't have the time to waste on you anymore
I don't think that you even know what you're looking for
For my own sanity I've gotta close the door
And walk away..." ~Avenue Q

"Wanna smell the flowers too
I just wanna be happy!" ~Gloria Estefan

Insert Sunday of insanity with play rehearsal, intense volleyball games, Pi Nu stuffage, and then going to see the Grudge followed up by Poltergeist at home with the bestest roommies and peoples ever!

"We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves
We were meant to live for so much more" ~Switchfoot

"I want more than just ok
More than fine,
More than bent and broken times
More than fine
More than just ok" ~Switchfoot

"Why God, why today?" ~ Miss Saigon

"So what happens now?
Where am I going to?" ~Evita

Ok, yes so that's where I am right now in a nutshell. If you know me and my randomness and musical loves you'll follow it and if not it's still pretty obvious if you know me. So yeah...I'm kinda out of it at the moment, emotionally numb really. But I had a great time attempting to play Diplomacy last night for Ellie's birthday at least. The food was fantastic and my alliance with Chris Hoffman and Brian as my advisor proved to be unstoppable. Or hey we at least crushed Andy and together would have killed Ellie eventually too. ;-) Anyways, time to finish up some work and then get outta here so I can hopefully make it to rehearsal a lil early tonight and tell Andelle I can't make it to rehearsal on Sunday now *grimaces* Here's hoping she'll be understanding....

Just a quick shout out there to Mary!

2004-10-28T19:45:21Z

So in case Mary doesn't see my comment in George's journal here is my thoughts yet again....

Carving pumpkins is something I can TOTALLY HELP YOU WITH!! :-) I'll help make it happen!! I can't sew but man oh man I can carve pumpkins. I dunno if you'll see this message Mary so I'll give ya a call after work...this is the first time I've had down time (so sad) but yes. You have done soooo sooooo much for me and are unbelievably fabulous, carving pumpkins would be the least I can do to help. You can even pick out the designs ya want! lol can grab Nat tonight too, maybe inbetween her and henry making their last minute touches since she's never made one before either.

P.S. I cannot believe you were up to 3 am!! You poor thing, there was no need for lack of sleeping and being late to work cause of me. I owe you big there honey. I tried to wake ya up and make sure ya got goin this morning. And by the way thanks for the comment about me being able to rock the cute/sexy look together at the same time. Definately made me smile big time :-)

GAH!

2004-10-27T17:40:20Z

So I suppose this teaches me a lesson. When I'm bored just stay bored at work, asking for stuff to do just gets me in trouble!

Yeah had a complete assay overload this morning for my boss (who isn't here by the way) :-( She forgot to tell one of the other people in the lab to make up the dilutions I needed. So first I had to go talk to her and then wait until she could make them since she has other work too. Totally not her fault but ended up pushing my time back an hour almost an hour and a half. Not helpful on assays that require hour, hour and a half, and half hour long increments inbetween. I had to start it all before lunch otherwise I'd never finish on time. *Note it's 1:30 now and I'm just gettin to lunch*

SOOOOOOO I then proceed to try and run my assays, I repeat assays. Yes, I had to do 3 of them today with a total of 3 different compounds. Two of them were on 96 well plates and the third was on a 384 well plate. Ya'll prolly dunno much about what I mean now but lemme just say this imagine a lil rectangle smaller than a pencil case that has to have 384 lil holes in it for my experiments to fit, only a total of 100 ul will fit in each one. They're freakin tiny!! So I ended up frantically trying to put the right amount of compound in the right plate, label it, etc. when all of a sudden I discover a serious experimental error.....the lil 384 plates are supposed to hold 100 ul right? Well that's the utmost max max volume they holf. However, if ya put 100 ul in each lil hole they kinda sorta leak out into the next one! *GASP* Noooooooooooooooooooooo!

So in a panic I remove the extra media and then proceed to only add half the amount of drug to my cells that I was supposed to cause that was the max I could get in those tiny lil buggers and not spill out. So that takes forever but I fix it. I'm totally proud of myself and I fix it....

Apparently, that method doesn't fix things when you're aiming for certain concentrations. Yeah, my lil cut there just diluted my cell concentrations down by a third. Which I can modify in my analysis but it may or may not work at all now depending. :::sigh::: Apparently I can remove the cells media and add back half of it to then add the same amount of drug like a needed. Fortunately, the woman who was here and explained all of this to me was very nice about it all and explained it. She called it a "learning experience." So she's gonna help me figure out how to best deal with this data if it even works. I'll be playin with em all afternoon so here's hopin.

OOOH! Chocolate! My mommy sent me a Halloween care package. I brought some yummy candy to work with me today. Mmmmmmm chocolate makes everything a lil better at least. And I still have bout half an hour before I have to go play with formaldehyde. Wow....this entry is rather long for me. I'm gettin better at this whole updating regularly thing. :-) For now though I think I'll go enjoy the rest of my chocolate and enjoy sitting down. I gotta run aruond bunches in good time and make it home in time to have dinner with Elile and her Mormon missionaries...that should prove to be interesting. Remind me to state my theory on Mormon guys at a later date. For now leave hugs while I go eat chocolate! :-)

bcutiepie @ 2004-10-22T12:29:00

2004-10-22T16:30:48Z

In researching Emily Dickinson I found my favorite poem of hers!! I just love the way it's written and adore the last two lines. Just figured I would share. She's not always depressing as you shall see! :-P

Time and Eternity

EMANCIPATION.

No rack can torture me,
My soul's at liberty
Behind this mortal bone
There knits a bolder one

You cannot prick with saw,
Nor rend with scymitar.
Two bodies therefore be;
Bind one, and one will flee.

The eagle of his nest
No easier divest
And gain the sky,
Than mayest thou,

Except thyself may be
Thine enemy;
Captivity is consciousness,
So's liberty.

Coolest Co-op ever!

2004-10-22T16:07:02Z

Yeah, I still came into work today feelin like crap because I had work I knew needed to get done and I'm doin it! Lil woozy here and there and the fever is killin my temperature sensativity but I'm still workin through it all. Morgan the girl down the hall, another biomed my year called in sick today! She was fine yesterday, I was the sick one. Yup that's it, I'm officially the coolest co-op ever and Merck should give me full time employment when I graduate. :-)

I don't have any other fun and entertaining stories like Mary and Vicky unfortunately. But I can say that things are workin out beautifully with Mary for my Halloween costume this year. I'm gonna be Buttercup from the Princess Bride! I'm very excited. And all boys should be too, cause I'm gonna look gorgous. I'm hopefully gonna make it down to south street this weekend to get the last of the fabric with Mary if we ever figure out when lol. And goin to the Renn Faire on Saturday which should prove to be much fun as I do love it there. And then Sunday will be craziness + costumes + Pi Nu to finish off the day. Sounds like a pretty good weekend to me I think. Anyways...my lunch break is about over and back to work I must go, especially if I wanna get outta here early *shhhh don't tell my boss...ooooh right she's not here this week no big deal then* :-)

P.S. The lil icon for lethargic looks bloated doesn't he!? That's not how I would depict lethargic at all!! I gotta talk to these LJ people....

Why is it only Thursday?

2004-10-21T15:38:10Z

Ok, so now Mary’s feelin better. Someone explain to me why I still feel sick as a dog?? It took every once of my strength this mornin to get outta bed and take a shower to come into work this morning. I was so dizzy so so nauseous it’s not even funny. I made it in and have been pushin through my experiments. It must have been hysterical to Frank who was watchin me trying to pipette earlier. My hands were shakin and the plate was perfectly clear and according to my vision anyways moving a lil bit. But I managed to get it done at least.

So now I’m on my lunch break eatin tostido chips which seem to be the equivalent of saltines waitin till my next round of pepto Bismol pills and advil. This is no good at all. I think I need to go home from work tonight and not have 50 million things to do i.e. rehearsals or pi nu stuffage and just collapse. Someone wanna make me some chicken noodle soup, I don’t think I have any left?? 0:-) Worth a shot anyways

In other news both shows I’m in are going to prove to be fabulous I’m sure. They’re both quite comedic and at points outright silly. My kinda shows really. But they’re both very physical and active pieces. So it’s gonna take a lot of work and energy to do them both. Guess I’ll get some good practice this Monday. My first rehearsal for each one runs back to back Monday night, Adelle gets me from 7-9 and then Ellie gets me from 9-10. However, I’m very excited about both. Ooooh head is spinning again, I think it’s time to take some more medicine…will update more later. Someone make this thing go away!

Brandi

"And all because of him....my world is changing"

Questions from Melissa :-)

Life is good

:::sigh:::

:-)

He loves me! :-)

Pondering

:-)

Yay!

The Random Question Meme!

So happy....best boyfriend ever

"Let's enjoy the view and neverland" ~Some Things Are Meant to Be

*sigh of relief*

Oooh oooh yay!

Yay for Thanksgiving Break

Joinin the band wagon

It's supposed to be another manic Monday...

"It's just another manic Monday..."

Update

Me!? A Model???

:::sigh:::

Just a quick shout out there to Mary!

GAH!

bcutiepie @ 2004-10-22T12:29:00

Coolest Co-op ever!

Why is it only Thursday?

sigh of relief